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Blog of Kip McGrath Education Centres - Holdfast Bay

The pressure of writing

September 17
by Annie 17. September 2014 10:51

Has your child’s teacher said, “He just doesn’t want to write’”?

Does your teenager suffer from a sore hand after writing at school?

Has your uni student asked for Nurofen to help her complete a written exam?

Does your child have poor handwriting?

If you answered yes to any of these, please read on!

 

Why has the simple act of writing become such a chore for school kids these days? It is by far the biggest ‘gripe’ area that we have to deal with. “Aw, not writing, I hate writing, it sucks!” Or words to that effect! According to recent research one in three children struggles with handwriting. If this is true it has serious implications for their educational achievement. 

 

It is tempting to view this as a sign of laziness or apathy, but be honest, when was the last time you wrote a letter? I mean a real letter, with a folded sheet of paper placed in an envelope with a stamp? No, I can’t remember either, and yet most of us ‘oldies’ grew up in a time when letters still had meaning!

 

The truth is that all generations are now affected by our increasing reliance on computers, tablets and smartphones. We don’t need to write, so we don’t. It is that simple, and like any learned skill, if writing isn’t practised, the quality drops and the speed slows. The effect of this is bad enough for the over 35s, who spent their pre-technology school days working with paper and pen, but for the younger generation it is as if this once-essential skill had never existed.

 

This is hardly surprising as children are growing up in a world of tablets, phablets and smartphones; cursive writing is such a bore when you can ‘stroke’ or tap a screen and get the same results. Even the humble credit card has abandoned writing, with signatures now banned and pin codes the new security preference. 

 

There is also a generation of young teachers entering the profession who have a natural preference for technology. The circle is complete. iPads and laptops have replaced textbooks, homework is online and handwritten work is viewed as inefficient and time consuming. 

 

We must remember that handwriting is not innate, like seeing or talking, it is a learned skill that must be practised. With limited hours, huge administration demands and increased performance pressures, can we really blame teachers if they rely more on technology? Imagine the quick, systemised marking that can be achieved!  

 

So, is writing a dying art? Is it doomed to tread the same path as Latin and become a quaint antiquity practised by the few? I sincerely hope not, because writing is more than simply communicating. Writing is a slower, more thoughtful process than typing. It involves planning, attention to detail and commitment to task. It is a complex skill that affects cognitive development and exercises visual, motor and memory circuits. When we write we develop our hand-eye coordination and fine motor skills. According to the Wall St Journal, studies have shown that handwriting engages parts of the brain that typing doesn’t. 

 

The ability to write and the quality of the text are inextricably linked. Professor Rhona Stainthrop, researching children’s writing abilities, says that there is growing evidence that those who write faster and more legibly get better grades. We see it in the centre all the time; good answers lost in the midst of poor handwriting and slow writers who have not automated their writing skills adequately, so much so that thinking about their writing is getting in the way of developing their thoughts on paper.

 

This leaves you, as parents, with a tough task. Most of your kids are fighting against writing. Oh, there are still a few for whom writing is a natural part of the learning process, but for most it is an ‘old’ skill that doesn’t seem to fit in to their high-tech world. And yet, in the ‘real’, working, world, writing is still very much in evidence. Meeting notes, supply lists, a quick reminder to a colleague, even the famed ‘napkin’ planning session, all come alive through writing. Even now there is no substitute for pen or pencil on paper; it’s a quick and effective low-tech way of communicating.  

 

Which makes it all the more important that you encourage your kids to write at every opportunity. In the centre we use different approaches to encourage writing. For instance, we allow kids to illustrate their writing, so drawing becomes the reward for writing. We also choose engaging writing topics, like the Minecraft contest we have running at the moment; kids who never write are suddenly producing pages of text! 

 

The next time your kids want something, for instance a ticket to the Royal Show, ask them to put it in writing. Encourage them to explain in words why they need or deserve to have their prize. If it isn’t convincing enough, work with them to edit their writing so that it achieves its objective. A bit of coaxing and extra work now will pay dividends later on when your kids are able to achieve at university or work because writing is a practised skill that enables them to communicate effectively. 

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General | technology, imagaination,

Active Body or Active Mind

April 07
by Annie 7. April 2014 12:25

 Childhood is an amazing time, full of exploration, discovery and wonder. It is also a busy time as we balance the competing needs of growing minds and bodies. Nowhere is this more evident than in the tug of war between education and sports.

 No question, Aussies love sports, of all kinds, and we want our kids to enjoy them as much as we do. At Kip McGrath we see evidence of this on a daily basis as we are one of the ‘after school activities’ vying for their valuable time. Students arrive at our doors in full sports kit, soaking wet from swimming, surfing or surf lifesaving, or towelling their hair after a quick shower and a hasty change of clothes.

 It is great to see them active and we encourage it, although there are times when it is difficult to find a free space for tutoring and we have lost out on a few occasions to sports events. Overall though, the old adage of ‘healthy body, healthy mind’ does ring true, and although by no means a hard and fast rule, we do tend to find that the kids who squeeze every minute out of every day have more energy than those with time on their hands. 

 The difficulty comes when parents are forced to choose between activities. This can be for financial reasons, work commitments or family, but the result is the same, and it is often a hard choice between sports and education.

 It is a real ‘hearts and minds’ struggle. The mind will explain to the parent that sports is a fleeting fancy and education is forever, but there is a very loud heart team mascot in the background shouting about fun, winning and taking part. The heart often wins; it has fun, cultural support and cool sports kit on its side. We have times tables and grammar rules.

 But this is the thing. It doesn’t have to be one or the other, just a little less of one to allow for the other. We have met, and worked with, plenty of adults who wish that they had spent a little less time on the pitch (or in the pool, or on the track) and a little more time hitting the books (okay, tapping the keys and looking at the screen). It is true that you don’t get a second chance at being a kid, and you will never be as fit again, but it is also true that your brain will never be as agile and as receptive to new information and new ways of thinking.

 Education is really sports for the mind, and like all sports natural talent only takes you so far, practice is the key to winning. If you think about it that way it just makes sense to include it amongst your child’s other activities. Give your child the best chance at winning in all areas.

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A Christmas Challenge

December 17
by Annie 17. December 2013 16:17

On Sunday I joined my singing group Tutti, for our annual Christmas event. I have mentioned Tutti many times before in this blog, but for those that missed it the Tutti choir is a mixed-abilities choir that operates from the charmingly quirky and colourful premises of Tutti Arts, based on the MINDA campus.

I have been singing with Tutti for a few years now, and it is without question one of the best and most rewarding parts of my life. To stand alongside the able and those with physical and mental challenges, and together produce music that makes people smile, laugh and cry, is, quite simply, an endlessly amazing experience.  

For this event we sang a variety of styles, including carols, folk, jazz and gospel, and, in true Tutti style, the South African National Anthem (Nkosi Sikelel iAfrika), as a tribute to the late Nelson Mandela.  If you can believe it, we sang in Xhosa, Zulu, Sesotho, and Afrikaans. Not bad with only two days’ notice to learn it! It was a moving experience, for us and, judging by the applause, the audience as well.

 

President Obama said shortly after Mandela’s passing - “He achieved more than could be expected of any man.  Today he has gone home…he no longer belongs to us; he belongs to the ages." 

Whether or not you believed in his politics, or his stance on violence for change, there is no question that his courage and conviction forced change in his country. He proved that one man can make a difference. We may not all be Nelson Mandela’s, or Ghandi’s, or the countless other leaders, male and female, who defied the limitations of race, colour and creed to achieve great things, but we can all in our own ways stand up for what we believe in.   

When I visited South Africa in 2001, it was to attend a lavish wedding in ‘polite society’, far from the poverty experienced by the mass populace. When I mentioned that I planned to visit Soweto, the ‘notorious’ slum, they struggled to hide their shock. It was so far removed from their safe and cozy existence that it really did seem like another world, and my mentioning it made me a threat. But I was determined, and, as Mark will confirm, I seldom back down when committed to something. 

 

The next day, not only was I the only woman on the bus, I was the only person on the bus period! My driver gave me a fascinating tour of the streets and shared his favourite café. I shared lunch with an in spiring man whose father had been shot alongside Steve Biko, trained as a doctor in Cambridge in the UK and now had a practice in Soweto.

As it turned out, my visit to that dangerous place was the highlight of my trip, and forever changed my view of the country and, of course, Nelson Mandela’s fight to change it. I suppose I am a bit of a risk taker, but I also know that the risk I took that day influenced the way I think, and has in some way led me to where I am now, helping kids to achieve their best thousands of kilometres from the place I was born and brought up. 

As Helen Keller said - “Life is either a daring adventure of nothing at all.” We don’t all need to climb Everest, hike to the poles (well done though Prince Harry) or save our countries from oppression, but we can take up smaller challenges. I love working with the kids in our centres, watching as their initial nervousness and lack of confidence gives way to a new energy as they gain knowledge and realise that they can actually do it. To them, catching up and gaining new knowledge is every bit as challenging as Mandela’s struggles, and I love being a part of their triumph.

I will keep blogging through the holidays, but if I miss next week due to too much Xmas cheer, I want to take this opportunity to wish all of our kids and their families all the joy of the season and we both look forward to welcoming you back in the new year for more challenges!

    

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A Season for Traditions

December 01
by Annie 1. December 2013 21:10

Amazingly, a year has passed and it is once again the 1st December with Christmas Day just around the corner. Across the country eager little hands are breaking through the paper restraints of the first day of their advent calendars, a tradition that I hope never dies.

I am not particularly religious, but every year I look forward to this little ceremony, which as far as I’m concerned is the true countdown to Christmas. That little window of mystery awaits me every day (yes, I still have one – Smiggle this time!) with a tiny little present just for me. Today was a plastic whistle, just what every full-grown businesswoman needs! I am sure that it, and its little friends, will probably find its way in to the eager hands of our nieces and nephew, but the present itself is almost irrelevant; it is the anticipation that matters. Of course, I did read about a beer-themed advent calendar this week, complete with actual samples that might just change my perspective on that!

All of which brings me to Christmas itself. Mark and I grew up in countries that had occasional snow (me, UK) or were deluged in it (Mark, Canada), so for us making merry without the white stuff can be a challenge. Even after more than 7 years, finding the Christmas spirit in 40 plus can be a challenge. Having plenty of family nearby helps of course, and it is hard not to be inspired by the way kids are still able to enjoy the simple things, even now, surrounded by every electronic  diversion they can get their hands on.

Nevertheless, this year I am determined to be less ‘ba humbug’ and get more proactive with my merriness; I will enjoy Christmas or die trying beneath a weight of candy canes, crackers and cake! I nearly ran a group of kids from Lions when I spotted them selling Christmas puddings in our street. When I say ‘ran over’, I was actually driving at the time and launched on to the curb lest I miss the chance to buy the one thing that everyone dreads eating at this time of year! Who invented Christmas pudding and why did they have to inflict it on the rest of us?

One tradition that we are both very looking forward to is our annual get-together with friends in McLaren Vale over steaming bowls of Moules Frites, otherwise known as muscles and chips, a simple yet wonderful meal that combines with flagons of wine and endlessly mad conversation for a great evening. Our good friend, and founder of this tradition, is returning to us from the UK for the Christmas season and we can’t wait to catch up.

I will of course again this year be singing with the Tutti Choir, and you are all welcome to join us for a concert of Christmas favourites. The venue and ticket details are below. http://www.trybooking.com/Booking/BookingEventSummary.aspx?eid=68280

Perhaps it is unseasonal weather we have been having recently, but I do feel more ‘Christmassy’ this year than I have for a while. I have even finally broken open the box of candle-making supplies that have been in the closet since my course last year and a few friends and rellies may be getting a bit of fragrant light in their lives this season!

 

Our Christmas newsletter is on the way, along with Christmas cards and lolly bags for all of ‘our kids’. The countdown has begun! Rediscover your old traditions, or make some new ones, and enjoy this wonderful time of the year. Just keep your hands off my Christmas pudding!

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Fun!

November 17
by Annie 17. November 2013 20:34

It’s a little word, fun; a throw-away cheapened by advertisers everywhere. But there really is no substitute, no other word that so completely encapsulates something that is entirely not boring, work, routine or a chore; fun is escape from all of that.
I am married to the world’s biggest kid (as any of our students being tutored by him will readily give evidence of), and although his grey hairs (distinguished silver I keep telling him!) attest to his middle-years, he resolutely refuses to grow up. He still finds pleasure in the most ridiculous un-grownup things, like visual humour (slipping on a banana peel gets him every time), remote control helicopters (which he insists on trying to land on my head!) and inline skating with his equally nutty brother around (the other) 12 year olds at a child’s roller skating birthday party!
But I love him for his nuttiness, the ease with which he can access that 12 year old inside him that can still be filled with wonder at something new. And his madness is infectious; although I pretend to the world that I am a serious grownup, complete with my own business, employees and a tax return, having a ‘boy’ husband gives me license to dance around the house like a loon, have chocolate for breakfast and laugh at silly things until I snort.
Who says we need to grow up? Apart from the expectations of society, colleagues, friends and family, what law is in place that forces us to abandon childishness when we leave childhood? If there was such a law, no children’s books would be written, no children’s TV produced. And let’s be honest, ‘extreme sports’?  Surely they are just an excuse to muck about like kids again.
The reason I bring this all up is the link below, which features a month of dinosaur madness created by a husband and wife for their children. In an age of endless digital diversion, it is a very welcome breath of innocent wonder. Watch it, learn from it, and find some way to add a bit of simple joy to the lives of your kids; or friends, or colleagues, or family; basically, anyone that needs a big dose of ‘stop taking yourself so seriously and laugh a little’.
https://medium.com/thoughts-on-creativity/6f4cb1886d41
Hmmm, I really should link this back to my business as that is after all theoretically why I write these things, even though I do sometimes go off on tangents. I guess Mark and I kind of naturally build fun in to the way we work. We know the kids are with us to learn, to improve themselves and achieve their potential, and this is of course our primary focus, but does it have to be an overly serious and dry activity?
We don’t think so. We honestly believe that kids learn best when they are allowed to be themselves, when they are allowed to have a bit of (whisper it) fun! Fractions, grammar, algebra, serious topics that demand close attention to concept, process and fact, but we can ‘weave’ a bit of fun into the process. We stand by our results, which (excuse me while I pat my own back), are consistently good, and yet our sessions are full of smiling, happy, sometimes noisy, kids, who are getting on with the process of learning, but having fun doing it.
If you are reading this with a mountain of washing waiting, dinner to prepare, work that has stacked up and needs to be tackled over a precious weekend, then you, and probably your kids, need a ‘fun’ break. Read the link again, see if any mad ideas form in your head, then grab the maddest one and bring it to life. What’s the worst that can happen; a laugh, maybe two? Remember, we only get one life, so fill it with as many giggles as possible. You won’t regret it!  

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The sound of music

November 04
by Annie 4. November 2013 18:02

 

As I am sure I have mentioned (probably more than once – sorry!) we are extremely busy at the moment, partly because of the new centre and partly because more kids need us, which is great. However, when Saturday arrives it does leave me with that running on empty feeling after 6 long days of admin, phone calls, planning and tutoring. But in spite of this, or perhaps because of it, when I was invited to a weekend concert by the mother of one our kids who would be singing in it, I jumped at the chance, I think more for the change of scenery than anything else! I got far more than that though.


The concert was held at Walford Girls School, and was the final in a series of concerts for youth choirs. Jed, our student, is in the Australian Youth Choir. I sat with Jed’s mum and grandma in the front row. Jed appeared on stage, angelic, in a blue and yellow robe.  We could see his eyes search the 400-strong audience for a friendly face. The beam on Jed’s face when he saw me sitting next to his mum was priceless. And then singing began. It wasn’t long before I was smiling too!


Some of you will know that one of my hobbies is singing in the Tutti Choir, a mixed abilities choir based out of Minda. Singing is one of my great joys, whether I am singing or listening, and within minutes the simple pleasure of hearing young voices joined in choreographed unison had completely taken me out of myself. If I closed my eyes I was transported back to every cathedral, church and concert hall that I had visited to hear a choir. It is a difficult feeling to describe, but for me it is so moving that it often moves me to tears (which can be a little embarrassing when you are in mixed company and also trying to hold a conversation!).


Singing for young children is a wonderful experience. If they are engaged early enough, before self-consciousness and peer pressure can interfere, it can provide them a way to express themselves, boost their self-esteem, gain a wider appreciation of music, and achieve in something completely different to sport or school. Like our centre, the best choirs provide an environment that is safe and supportive as well as inclusive. It is an introduction to another part of life that, like travelling or the arts, will make them more rounded as people and more open to new experiences. It encourages self-discipline, better communication and inter-personal skills and a strong sense of teamwork and community.


For all of these reasons, and after weeks and months of work excuses, I will be returning to my choir this week, leaving the centre in the capable hands of our tutors. I will admit to being a bit of a ‘show pony’, and enjoy getting up on stage in the limelight. But, more than this, I miss the sheer pleasure of joining my voice with others and creating something that is bigger than all of us. Practice is enjoyable enough, but when you join with the audience in concert and share a piece of music, well, it is hard for me to imagine anything else that gives as much pleasure.


I would encourage all of you to seek out a concert near you in the run up to Christmas. Take your kids, drag them if need be. You will be amazed at the transformation in them when the singing starts, especially the young ones. You are of course welcome to attend the Tutti Christmas concert on Sunday 15th December in Norwood and give me a wave and an encouraging smile!

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Girls Rising

October 28
by Annie 28. October 2013 21:43

And to think, I nearly didn’t go…

For one reason or another last week seemed to drag on forever. Friday arrived and I still had another morning of tutoring and an afternoon of training with our new tutors to go. I needed a diversion, so I went to the private screening of a film, Girl Rising, that I had been undecided about. I am so glad that I did!

I went with low expectations, a hope for an hour or so diversion, but I received so much more. From the opening scene I was completely gripped. If the measure of success for a film is emotional exhaustion, this one scores 10 out of 10. I laughed, I cried, I cried again, and at the end I carried part of it away with me, and it stayed with me all weekend.  I tried to explain it to Mark, but I couldn’t do it justice; it is simply something that you need to see. However, I will try to explain it to you, which is what the representative from World Vision asked us to do. Here goes.

Education for all children is something I clearly support, but running alongside that, for much of the world’s population, is gender inequality. Here are some compelling statistics from the film:

• There are 33 million fewer girls than boys in primary schooling and 66 million girls don’t attend school at all globally.

• Girls with 8 years of education are 4 times less likely to be married as children.

• 14 million girls under 18 will be married this year. That’s 38 thousand today – or 13 girls in the last 30 seconds.

• The #1 cause of death for girls 15-19 is childbirth. Yes, you read that right. CHILD BIRTH! IN CHILDREN!

The film is stunningly shot and beautifully crafted. It follows the stories of 9 girls in developing countries, whose challenging tales are scripted by professional writers from their own countries. Each story is narrated by a famous actor (including Cate Blanchett and Anne Hathaway), and interspersed with horrific statistics like the ones above.

This movie educates, inspires, moves, shocks and asks audiences to take action. Each girl’s story is recreated in film, using various artistic styles—animation, documentary, and re-enactments. The girls star in their own stories apart from an 11yr old Afghan girl, whose role was played by an actress to protect her safety.   Her identity could not be compromised because her husband (yes, husband) and community would most likely kill her if they found out she was speaking out in protest against her situation. However, despite her struggle, she is able to gain education due to the generosity of free educational groups.

I learned about the types of situations and circumstances that can be avoided if a girl is educated and attends school.  My favourite story, if you can possibly have a favourite, was abut Wadley (pictured above), who was displaced from her school due to the devastating earthquake of Haiti, insisting that she was allowed in school even though her family couldn’t afford it. She is surrounded by devastation and everyday challenges that we simply cannot comprehend, yet continues to share with everyone her gorgeous and unstoppable smile.

All these girls fight through unthinkable situations and circumstances to receive access to education. We often take education for granted. We shouldn’t. We should see it for what it is; something precious that literally millions of other children around the world can only dream of. I sympathise with parents who face the challenge of balancing their children’s lives so that they include sports, all of the other activities on offer, and education. We are so used to having easy access to things that simply don’t exist in other parts of the world, we have somehow reached a stage where we think of them all as equal. They are not.

Put simply, education is the most important gift that a child can receive. Everything else that they do, from relationships to travel to work to sports, is interpreted largely through the education they receive. There are of course elements of natural ability, upbringing, cultural environment and societal influences, but all of this is made more useful, circumspect, functional and worldly, through education. There is no substitute; no calculator, iPad or smartphone can replace an agile, knowledge-filled brain that has the ability to adapt and reason in any environment. Computer games, netball, hanging out with friends, are transient, education is for life. Watch Girl Rising and you will understand.

 

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To tutor or not to tutor?

October 20
by Annie 20. October 2013 18:48

 

For those waiting with baited breath for our next blog instalment, apologies, we have both been burning the candle at both ends running the existing business, managing the purchase of our new centre in Valley View and recruiting staff for both! It would be an understatement to say that it has been a busy time! End of term break? What end of term break?

Which brings me to my ticklish topic for the week: how much control should parents really allow their kids over whether they attend tutoring or not? It is a difficult area for parents, because of course tutoring is not school, and therefore not mandatory, so as a parent can you really insist that your child attends tutoring if they make it clear that they don’t want to?

It is a question faced by many parents after an end of term break, and even more so after the summer holidays. Let’s face facts; we are talking about kids, whether they are in primary or secondary school, and after a week or more of video games, sleeping in late and hanging around with friends, any form of mental exercise will sound less than appealing, especially if it is in addition to school. In fact, Mark and I are more surprised by the students who are eager to return to tutoring after the holidays than those who drag their feet.

This is where the ‘tough love’ element comes in I’m afraid. Unless something miraculous has happened during the break, and your child has suddenly gained maths or English knowledge they did not possess at the end of the previous term, those skill gaps will still remain and tutoring will still be required. As someone who has completed their schooling and knows the value knowledge has at University, other forms of further education and in the workplace, you have a responsibility to use that perspective to advise your child.

If your child says ‘I don’t want to go anymore’, you have to recognise that this is a natural reaction to losing the freedom of the holidays, and be wise enough and tough enough to urge them on. Make no mistake, this is a huge responsibility; if they are remedial and there are significant skill gaps, your response to their attempt at giving up will impact on the rest of their schooling and potentially their working life.

If you are unsure how to handle the conversation, or need support, ask the tutor. As noted, this is not an uncommon post-holiday reaction, and any experienced tutor will have faced this challenge many times before. When the stakes are this high, a tough conversation is a small price to pay.

I hasten to add by the way that it is extremely rare for the negativity to last even to the end of the first session, at least in our centres; students soon relax back in to familiar surroundings and get on with their work. So please relax, kids are remarkably resilient, it is the parents who agonise! Any doubts your child has now will be more than compensated for when they can read at the level of their peers, or achieve their first ‘B’ or ‘A’ in maths. These are the things that matter, the things that have long term value.

Have a great week!

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The Hairy Truth

September 15
by Annie 15. September 2013 20:25

 

I freely admit that today I am suffering the after effects of too much fun. Last night Mark and I helped celebrate the half century achievement of a lovely woman and friend whose selflessness makes anyone she comes across an instant friend. Put simply, if you don’t like her, your friend radar has gone extremely wonky!

Anyway, as is common for all similar celebrations, the passing years attract people of all ages and from all walks of life, from her lovely, accomplished and attractive daughters and their friends to us, of the, um, ever so slightly older generation, and beyond. If the numbers of people who attend your birthday celebrations is a measure of your value to others, she is highly valued indeed.

But this is not a commentary on our friend’s social acceptance, but instead the form of the party itself. It is normal at these events for people to gather in their usual peer groups, facing inwards, backs to the rest of the world as a protective barrier, passing between them the hot potatoes of shared stories that guarantee that no stranger can force their way in. But not at this one.

Our friend’s master stroke was to introduce a theme, a small and, in some cases, exceedingly hairy device that effectively disguised all partygoers: wigs. Long, short, curly, straight, or, in my Mark’s case, mohawked and multi-coloured! The result was hilarious confusion as longstanding friends struggled to locate each other and were forced to introduce themselves to complete strangers in a wig-infested elimination round.

Men of all ages returned to the dark days of the 80s rock gods, but although some of the younger ones seemed to enjoy this renaissance of hair, and quite suited it, it has to be said that the effect of combining shimmering locks with middle-aged spread was not always as positive.

Of course, the girls didn’t take it too seriously, just bit of fun really. No, not really, in some quarters it was all out war to try and out glamorise the competition! Greying, short, sensible haircuts disappeared under flowing tresses in all hues, matched to outfits that certainly hadn’t been just hanging around in the closet!

Basically, we all ‘went to town’, and had a great time for the first part of the evening re-introducing ourselves to the new personalities our friends had become, and introducing ourselves to the people we thought could be our friends and soon would be! 

As the evening wore on, and the bar staff fought to keep up, we moved in to a new stage, as the carefully staged wig and outfit combinations were stripped apart and wig-swapping became the latest craze. At last count, in the wee hours, one friend had managed to beg, borrow and barter, at least a dozen wigs, each of which became a new Facebook identity. There must be many of her friends unconnected with the party completely baffled by the quick fire transformations!

My point in all of this hairy mayhem is that the wigs acted as a social leveller. We were suddenly all the same; confused, self-conscious and ever so slightly itchy. We moved through the party in disguise, free to talk to whomever we wanted, without the social barriers that usually apply. In short, it was great fun and I highly recommend it.

Oops, I’m supposed to have an educational theme in here somewhere. Let’s see. Don’t judge a book by its cover?  Treat others as you wish to be treated? Actually, there may be something in that; so many of ‘our’ kids arrive with labels and histories, carried before them almost as a pre-judgement. But we refuse to let history colour our present with them. Our centre is a new start for many of them, and I honestly believe that this more than anything else has helped many of them to succeed. Sermon over, I’m off for yet another Sunday recovery cup of tea!

 

 

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To write or not to write?

September 08
by Annie 8. September 2013 17:31

When I was a young girl, way back before iPads, smartphones and laptops, thanking someone for a present, or asking Santa Claus for something special, meant writing a letter. I’ll let that sink in for a moment for those born after the dawn of the keyboard.


Have you recovered? Yes, I really did say the words ‘writing’ and ‘letter’, ancient terms that bring to mind the horse and carriage, knights in shining armour and the invention of the wheel. But that’s not all. I am going to shock you even more: I still hand write letters! And thank you cards, and post cards, and invitations.


Why do I do this in an age when messages can be sent with a few button presses or key strokes and people no longer expect whole sentences in communications? Well, partly it is precisely for that reason, because it is unexpected, outside the norm, and I do like to be a little bit different. 


It also makes me feel good using all of those words that I have stored in my brain over the years and rarely get a chance to use. There is an undeniable pleasure in grouping together just the right words, in just the right order, and creating something that is far more than simply a combination of letters and spaces. Words can evoke emotion, describe a landscape unseen, put substance to an idea and take the reader back to a shared memory.


Can we do the same in a conversation? In part, but conversation throws words away, writing saves them. Also, when we speak we are hampered by other factors; time, convention, the natural reserve of sharing too much in public, the need to be liked and take other people’s opinions into account. When we are writing we can stretch out in our own space, take as much time as we need, be selfish, get all the emotional stuff out in the open, use those big words that would make us sound la de da in public, because we can.


There is a freedom to express in writing that is difficult to find in conversation. No matter how many times I speak by phone with my Aunt back in the UK, who I have always had a close bond with, I can somehow never get her past the discomfort of speaking on the phone with someone thousands of kilometres away. It is like talking with someone I barely know. So, in between phone calls, I write, and in those letters I can share all of the things I can’t by phone. And it works; we connect far better by writing than long distance talking.


Some time ago I began writing to my goddaughters. I have a few, seven in fact, all fast-growing girls and young ladies towards whom I feel a moral responsibility. The letter-writing with them is a little hit and miss, but I am pleased that my eldest goddaughter (17) and I now regularly write back and forth, and this has added a new level to our relationship. We share things that I am sure we would not do when speaking; writing somehow creates this lovely intimate and trusting environment, separate to the ‘real’ world.


We recently ran a contest at the centre, asking the kids to write persuasive letters to Kip McGrath, convincing him that their families were deserving of an all-costs family ticket to the Royal Adelaide Show. I was surprised by the number of entries, and more so by the obvious care taken in writing them. The winner was written by one of our younger students, who has struggled with the early stages of reading and writing, and spent three days writing his letter. He included a bribe in the form of a ‘bucket of fairy floss’ for Kip, but the main reason for his win, apart from the quality and honesty of his letter, was the use of an envelope, properly addressed to Mr Kip McGrath. I was genuinely moved by his efforts and, obviously, so was Kip.


All of which, dear reader, brings me round to you. I want you to try, writing that is. A little thank you note, or a letter to your Mum, or your children; something that forces you to stop, pick up a pen and focus on the act of writing, just for a few minutes. Then, let that letter float away from you, straight in to the nearest post box. You may be pleasantly surprised by the reaction you get, first to the use of ‘snail mail’, but then, just perhaps, to the time and care you have invested in sending them a special message.

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